3 Key tips to Self love, after Self destruction
Self Portrait by Christina O. @artist_life (IG)
Although I'd like to blame a few of my ex-boyfriends for my lack of self love, I have grown. I had to realize, my lack of self love was due to a lack of self awareness. To become fully aware of your self means, to become aware of all your thoughts and actions, as well as, beliefs others have given you about yourself; and to be able to see YOU, down to your NAKEDNESS.
It took me quite a while to stop victimizing myself, and understand the role I played in my dysfunctional relationships. How I was the catalyst, in my brewing self destruction, by staying. In not one of these relationships was I forced to stay, or threatened if I were to leave. I just didn't leave. And that lack of self love, slowly lead to my self destruction.
In my search for myself, that has lasted the last 20 years, I have finally taken time to Re-Member (bring together), my Mind, Body, and Spirit. I can finally see Myself. Who I Really Am.
Here are 3 Tips that I Used to get back to Self love, after my Self destruction.
1. Take Time TO LOVE ON YOU!
Make sure you make time for a little lovin' on yourself after bathing. When you are lotioning/oiling your body, speak to your body, thank your body for its strength, and all the hard work it does for you. I like to start at my feet, and work my way up to my heart; Moving my hands in a clockwise motion to aid in circulation. I thank every body part as I caress it, speaking aloud, "Thank you feet, I thank you for carrying this body we share, I thank you for allowing me to dance. Thank you too, little toes. Thank you legs, so beautiful and strong..." etc. I find something to be grateful for, about every single body part. Speaking life into yourself is one of the most amazing things you can do. You may even find, that you have not given thanks to some parts of your body, ever, in life. The effects of this will be immediate, even if minimal. The practice of this on a daily basis, will create a phenomenal appreciation for parts of you, you may have never given notice to.
2. Meditation/Guided Meditation
I have suggested meditation to quite a few people, for numerous reasons, and I hear the same thing quite frequently. "I cant meditate", or "I can't get my mind to be still". This, for me, this is very understandable, I was in the same boat. My mind would wonder about everything! Things that I wouldn't even think about when I wasn't meditating. It has taken me a conscience effort to bring discipline to my own meditation practice. However, it has been well worth it. In this quest to restore self love, you will HAVE to put in work. Daily, is best.
The idea, isn't to get it the first time around (if you do, CONGRATS!!), maybe not even the second, third, or forth. The idea is to stick with it. Make time for yourself, to allow the positive reinforcement to soak into your self conscious. "The Daily Positive", "YouAreCreators", and "PowerThoughts Meditation Club" are a few of my favorite channels to scroll through and find meditations that fits whatever mood I am in or need to create.
3. Enticing the Senses
Everyone's senses operate differently. Some are more intrigued by touch, while some can be turned off by to much touch. Some people are moved by visual beauty, and others will take the beauty of sound, over sight. For me, I tend to close my eyes, so I can hear the music better, creating the images that pleases me in my mind. It wasn't until after my cancer journey began, that I began to fall in love with smell. Noticing how different aromas, created different feelings within my heart and mind. While the smell of eucalyptus creates a energy of vitality, dragons blood makes me feel sexy. When mixing all of the things together that entice my senses, I create a energy of self love and self exploration that is Divine. Taking a hot bath (touch), with a few drops of your favorite oils (smell), listening to your guided meditation, or favorite music (sound), with candles burning to create ambiance (sight), sipping fresh squeezed juice, or your fav varietal (taste), can be done in a 10/15 minute bath. Of course, if time permits, stay in as long as you desire. Repeat as often as you can. You can not over dose on Self Love.
These are a just a few habits I practice daily to tell myself, "I Love YOU!". Incorporating these practices into your daily lifestyle, will definitely help you increase your Self Love. Consistency is everything. Love you!